Eternal

so life so far is hectic i’m now in skills 2 which is where i begin to make my own dishes and so far they’re ok but i fucking keep forgetting to take pics of the food i make and some of it’s good others not so much anyway i’m kinda nervous to begin skills 3 i’m gonna be making food for other people and i don’t know if they’ll like it …. I like the food that i make but that’s just me and I peronally prefer making mexican food and no not just tacos there’s soooo much more to mexican food than just tacos. anyway I finish classes the 19th and then i’m home for 2 glorious weeks in which i will be doing absolutely freaken nothing I am soo looking forward to it =D but as for right now i’m still in classes and i still have 1 week and 2 days left oh joy. I’m not particularly liking class right now cause well i feel as though i’m not doing so well but i know i can make it work. I WILL MAKE IT WORK!!! Life other than that is uneventful though i have made new friends hooray for friends =D I am soo sad

so I haven’t written in a while and a lot has changed. so I’ve finished B block which consisted of Gastronomy, Product Knowledge, Math, Writing, and Serve Safe. I got a D for PK cause well that class sucked and Gastro was my favorite I got a B. three weeks ago I started seafood ID & Fabrication it only lasted seven days. Seven days ago I started Meat ID & Fabrication which I had a final on today. The final was ok ID was somewhat difficult. I don’t think I got most of the cooking methods right.

The rest of the day did not end at all how I thought it would people were just pissing me off one right after the other. First this bitch named jenny she well she definitely can’t hack it. She will either fall apart when someone is yelling at her or she may be able to but fuck if i’m going to hire any bitch like her. She not only gives attitude like none other but every time she spoke I wanted to smack her with a sheet tray and bust her head it. Then this pain in the ass Max he’s ok but he, he just needs to finish what he starts. He said later if I had anything to say to say it to his face. The reason I didn’t say anything was cause I was so angry and trust me I’ve learned to keep my mouth shut.

I had told my friend Nacho that I get pissed off during finals and I guess he didn’t really understand but during writing he finally got it. I warned him I did I did He sometimes doesn’t listen but that’s normal.

On Monday (no three day weekend) I start skills class and I’m so nervous My teacher, Le Roux, I hear he’s good but you have to know your shit so this weekend I plan on studying my ass off. I really want some good food like Indian, Ethiopian, god do I miss Chicago

Hopefully with the next class I can start taking pics of shit that I made.

like i said People Suck so this has kind of been going on for a while i’ll just start from the begining i’ve made friends right? and alot of my friends are in my classes i’ve always been a focused person a driven person yet somehow i’ve become an idiot and i’m no longer doing so well in any of my classes Today for example i asked my friends if we had a quiz why would my friends tell me something different? oh wait it gets better i show up to class and turns out we do have a quiz i’ve studied absolutely nothing and i’m pissed these people are suppose to be my friends and it feels like i’m just annoying them or in the way. So i’m thinking for this week i’ll either disappear cause if i don’t get at least a B probably A would be better i’m fucked for every single one of my classes. That and in class i’m just going to sit away from my friends because i can’t really concentrate when i’m trying to listen to two people which is a bad idea to begin with I really need to get my act together and i already feel like i’m falling apart and that’s not good half the time i’m asking my friend nick to calm me down or to tell me i’m not going crazy I don’t know i just think i need to focus more on academics rather than social status

Just to let everyone know i’m not blaming my friends for my poor grades because in fact it is my fault i shouldn’t have relied on my friends to know what the hell is going on but i will say that if certain people don’t want to hang out with me then just say so i can take it and i’d rather someone tell me the truth than lie right to my face I hate it when people put up this fake front and they just bullshit everything it pisses me off All i’m asking is that you be straight with me no lying no bullshit

Soooo it’s been a while update i love updates well i’ve been in school since the 8th which was last week and the move was good a little hectic which was to be extected but it was also expensive cause had to bunch of stuff for my dorm which i didn’t have yet so i went shopping for those things also my room mates are ok i don’t really hang out with them much i have my own group of friends so i’m hardly in my room yes i have friends it is some how possible so there is Casey Lauren Jake and Carl. so Casey is from pensylvania lauren is from Boston but born somewhere else. Jake is from Ohio a little outside of Cleveland and Carl is from a suburb of Chicago which is good i got company lets see what else classes are cool i’m really interested in gastronomy its soo cool i am definitely going to like that class lets see what else there’s alot of stuff i pretty much have to do on my own cause well it’s not like high school where teachers just hand you everything here its sink or swim so i have to get use to that i just did my first batch of laundry today it takes forever i think my chef whites are going to be a pain in the ass umm i have alot alot of sowing to do and this would be sooo much easier with a sowing machine but i can deal i’m getting better at it

ok that is all for now good night or good morning depending on how you look at it

so tomorrow is my last day of work which i’m kinda sad and kinda happy about i really want to tell ruben how i feel but i dont’ know if i can i’m of coarse always to shy to say anything but who knows i may come back into town and it may be different so i leave for school next week on weds and im scared excited nervous there are so many emotions running through my head so much stuff i have to worry about and I want so much to just relax and enjoy this but i can’t If you knew me you’d know that my emotions dictate what others are feeling and most of the time my emotions are anger For me the anger builds up i usually calm down with music that helps alot I need to learn how to shut out the emotions of others but i can’t seem to do it

alright enough mumbo jumbo i went to Frontera Grill omg it was soooo good I had tamales with a pumpkin seed sauce it was delicious and for desert i had flan which i’ve had before but omg is it fucking good i liked one more than the other but i didn’t know the different flavors ohhh soooo good and right next door is where they’re opening xoco its one of Rick Bayless places its chocolate churroz and stuff like that i soo want to come back when it opens =D

soo i’m tired right now and i kinda just want to go to sleep

I am so swomped with alot of stuff like hospital visits way too much at the end of this month i will have gone to the doctor’s 5 yes FIVE times this month alone thats alot i’d say and well work is still work i finally end this week which is good i need the break and then that same night i am having my last girls night out hoot hoot i’m excited the day after that i have a dentist appointment and then finally that monday afterward i have a gyno appointment yeah lots of stuff to keep me busy oh and did i mention that ummm i still need to get some stuff for college like go shopping for jeans and maybe fall cloths also for a computer lock and a few other things but other then that i am all set for college holy crapola i’m actually going to college HOLY FUCK!!!

oh and one more thing

sooooo for the past i’d say two weeks two different guys have been trying to get to know me and i don’t really care but the things is i don’t want to get involved with anyone especially since i’m going away to school in less than two weeks i really do not see a point in it and i have no idea what to do should i tell both of them i don’t want to see them or just leave it since i’m leaving anyway???

so the past few days lets see i went to see Blink 182 they were amazing yesterday i went to see a local band called breakers broken they’re pretty good look em up on myspace or purevolume they just came out with a new ep good music i’ve had their songs stuck in my head for the past few days anyway whatelse i went to the doctor’s today and i’m now on the patch cuase of my irregular periods and out of wack hormone levels

i finally found out who my room mates are and i talked to one of them they’re pretty cool i’m so excited to start all i need now is a tv bed sheets and a few things like that other then that i’m all set

i’ve been without my music for the past few weeks cuase i put it all on my external hard drive and i didn’t have to keep it out so i put it away and now i have no music =( i miss my musica oh well i’ll get it back soon ….like in 3 weeks…oh my going away party is this sat i’m excited then i have one more week of work i end the 27th and then the 28th i have a dentist appt and i get to chill for the next few days which is good i need a vacation badly !!!!

So update, since i’m starting school in about a month i’m soo swampt with doctors appointments, dentist, and stuff not to mention work and the fact that i have to look for all the stuff i need for college. Its crazy i’m surprised I havne’t already lost my mind anyway soo on weds I went to a cd release party which was fun. I got to listen to Breakers Broken acoustic which was amazing no offence but I think Last Man on the Planet sounded so much better acousticly (sorry herf, tim, neal) =(. I don’t want to discourage them the song is amazing. They should most definitely keep it but also you know give the audience a taste of the acoustics. haha I’m listening to it right now and the lyrics for Girl Behind the Bar sounds kinda like my situation right now haha anyway yeah that happened. They are having a show this sunday which i’m going to try and make but since i have work you know Ima try. So there’s that and then i’ve been recieving alot of new things like my amazing and beautiful and pure sex hard drive its 750 GB hehe :D I was so excited to get it the door bell rang and i practically jumped out of my chair i’m still wondering what i should name her but i’ll figure that out later. Another new addition is my stereo she’s also beautiful its actually the same one my sister has but whatever it was starting to grow on me.

Back to Breakers Broken for a minute HERF!!!! that track where its you singing (if you ever read this) dude you’re amazing i don’t know why he doesn’t sing more often honestly he’s good more than good AMAZING oooo and i hear they want to do a show in nyc omg they totally should i would love and i mean love to see them in nyc

OMG i completely forgot Blink 182 ahahahaha sorry had to be done their concert is this sat and i’m going with my sis Maria and Kelly oh and Pat (maria’s bf) too they finally get to see my tattoo hehe =D i’d say she’s beautiful i may add color in a little while but not right now  and i already know the next few tattoos i want like i want a crescent moon behind my ear i may want it trible style so i may ask alex to do that for me and i also want the eye of horus which is not the all seeing eye (thats behind the dollar bill) eye of horus is different and the last one i want is something for my nephew but that one im going to wait so i know what he’s like as an adult and stuff

oh by the way nephew update he’s still 2 he’s talking more potty training a little more and he’s getting better at it too he my sister in law and my bro are on vacation it was so cute he was asking for my dad saying abuelo and then mary told me yesterday that he’s been asking for me and my sis i was like awww i miss him soo much and him saying george haha ok

that is all cause this thing is getting pretty long for you guys to read

so i have no idea what i would call this guy he’s my co worker kinda his name is mike he’s half puerto rican and half italian he’s kinda ghetto but kinda not he’s just him umm he’s smart he just doesn’t realize how smart he is. He’s pacient and nice he’s 25 yeah older than me who cares anyway he’s a gentleman he hasen’t really even made a move on me which i have no comment on yet haha i like him but we’ve agreed that we dont’ want to start something since i’m going away and idk i would like to continue this but you know distance doens’t exactly make things easy so =( with distance…what else can i tell you about him…he’s got nice ass muscles mmm yummy hehe he looks more italian than puerto rican but he’s got that skin tone anyway i’m really tired so i’ll tell you more about him later

as for ruben yeah definitely DON’T think that’s going to happen though i wouldn’t mind it happening but i’ve got mike and plus i got less than 3 weeks left ….comment criticize whatever

so i have about a month left until i leave for school which is sept 7th thats when i move in and i’ve been planning my going away party which is pretty easy since i did it through facebook but now tons of people either aren’t going or don’t know if they’re going and i’m really pissed cause i feel like no one cares and now i don’t really see a point in having a party its pretty much just bye won’t see you for the next four years what also pisses me off is that my really close friends arne’t even going why don’t i just disappear would that be easier for you guys?

you tell me, is there even a point anymore?

nyc was so much fun the first night we went to the movies and saw harry potter then went to the hostel really late we had room mates they were french and really rood 2nd day we also went to the movies but here’s the jist we went to the rock and roll hall of fame saw the statue of liberty from afar saw ground zero which isn’t really ground zero anymore since its above ground went to st mark’s which is kind of like our belmont and clark but better we went to serandipity like in the movie soo cool we went to canal street and soho which was cool i got this cool ass grafitti pic its the train map of new york and its painted red and says unbreakable nyc its soo fucking cool i just have to frame it but first i kinda need to find a frame

when i got back i really didn’t want to go to work and when i did it was ok i was so tired though i just wanted to sleep but none the less i need money and the experience which only lasts the next month or so and my mom says she wants us to leave five days before i have to start which is a good idea but i kinda don’t want to i say we should leave 4 days before arrive and have 3 days to settle in and see what poughkeepsie and hyde park has in store for me i think thats a good idea and before that have a going away party, shop for all the stuff i need for college, pack everything that i need/want i think i’m going to have a hard time looking for stuff though cause i dont’ know if either town has whole foods or good grochery stores but i guess thats the benefit of going a few days early but i need to plan it to the T cause i need time to tell my boss and give notice of my leave….and maybe even tell my lover that i like him =D hehe so wish me luck fellas wish me luck